Writers’ Block: A cricket’s first week of school
By Nora Betts
Day 1: The humans have returned to campus and, alas, the reign of the crickets is severely threatened. This is the beginning of the end.
It all started at 7:49 a.m. when the first feet appeared. I was out creeping between Thom 001 and Thom 002 when the very earth beneath my spindly legs began to shake. From hurried freshmen to apathetic seniors, the mass exodus of humans from the Janzow cafeteria to the first class of the day brought unspeakable violence to my brethren. I barely escaped with my life, retreating to a far corner of the basement where the shoes couldn’t reach me. My friends were not so lucky.
After hours of trembling in fear– sometime around 3:35 p.m.– the footfalls stopped and the coast was clear. Oh, horror of horrors! The hallway was littered with the squished shells of my fallen friends. All I could do was chirp in agony. To think– this violence will continue for the next 15 weeks!
Day 2: I made the long trek from Thom to Dunklau today. The grass offered me some cover from the humans and their bloodthirsty shoes, though I had a frightening run-in with a squirrel. Finally in Dunklau and seemingly safe from the jaws of wildlife, a dog appeared!
“Charlie” – so he is called, according to the croons of the humans– hunted me down like it was some sort of sport. His curly paws padded behind me, his ferocious teeth chomping as I fled as fast as my bug legs could take me. I wriggled under a couch where his muzzle couldn’t reach and, at last, I was safe again. This truly is a house of horrors!
Day 3: I took my chances hopping to Link Library today. However, the humans’ desire for violence seemed to only increase in this new environment. Between my woeful chirps, I could hear mutterings of “stupid cricket” and “where the heck is that coming from?” and various expletives I don’t dare repeat. Sensing that I was in danger, I hopped across the carpet, slipped across the tile floor, bounded down the side stairs, and fled!
Day 4: I spent all day in Janzow. The events of the past few days had taken such a toll on my mental well-being that I spent the entire day screaming into the void behind the Pepsi machine near the mailroom.
Day 5: After a tiring day of running from death, I found my first moment of peace on the Weller lawn. A giant light– like the ones my moth acquaintances so often hurl themselves into– was displaying a beautiful moving picture. The humans, as terrible as they might be, seemed to be enjoying themselves. Their laughter and shouts of “Lightning McQueen!” were loud enough that I could chirp to my heart’s content and even snag a fallen popcorn kernel. Maybe this place isn’t so horrendous after all.
Day 6: I got squished.
